Beyond Miscommunication: Understanding Social Cognition in Autism and ADHD

Why Do Some Conversations Just Feel Off?

Ever had a conversation where you walked away feeling like something just didn’t click? Maybe you misread the other person’s tone or struggled to understand what they really meant. For many neurodivergent individuals, especially those with autism or ADHD, this is an everyday experience—and not due to lack of effort or intelligence. It all comes down to social cognition, the brain’s ability to interpret and respond to social interactions.

A recent review on social cognition in neurodevelopmental conditions, particularly autism and ADHD, sheds new light on this topic. Let’s dive into what social cognition is, how it differs between these conditions, and what that means for real-world interactions.

What is Social Cognition?

Social cognition is the mental toolkit that helps us interpret other people’s thoughts, emotions, and intentions. It includes skills like:

• Theory of Mind (ToM): Understanding that others have thoughts and feelings different from our own.

• Emotion Recognition: Picking up on facial expressions, tone of voice, and body language.

• Social Perception: Reading between the lines in conversations and understanding social cues.

For neurotypical individuals, these skills develop naturally over time. But for those with autism or ADHD, social cognition can look a little different.

Social Cognition in Autism vs. ADHD

Both autism and ADHD come with social challenges, but for different reasons.

Autism: A Challenge with Implicit Social Understanding

• People with autism often have difficulty processing unspoken social rules. They may struggle with picking up subtle cues, like sarcasm or body language, which can make interactions confusing.

• Studies show that autistic individuals tend to process social cognition explicitly, meaning they must consciously think about social interactions rather than intuitively understanding them.

• This leads to a unique but sometimes exhausting way of interacting—having to rely on logic rather than instinct in social situations.

ADHD: Social Skills Influenced by Executive Functioning

• In ADHD, impulsivity and inattention play a bigger role in social cognition challenges.

• Social struggles often stem from executive dysfunction—difficulties with impulse control, working memory, and focus. For example, someone with ADHD might interrupt frequently, miss subtle shifts in conversation, or zone out when someone is talking.

• Unlike autism, where understanding social rules might be more of a challenge, individuals with ADHD often understand the rules but struggle to consistently apply them in real time.

Can Social Cognition Improve?

The good news is that social cognition isn’t fixed—it can change and improve with age, experience, and support.

• In autism: Some interventions, like structured social skills training, can help individuals learn strategies for navigating social situations. However, the effectiveness of mentalizing (Theory of Mind) training remains debated.

• In ADHD: Stimulant medications have been shown to improve social cognition by reducing impulsivity and enhancing focus, allowing for more effective social interactions.

• For both: The Double Empathy Problem suggests that social challenges aren’t just on one side—neurotypical individuals also struggle to understand neurodivergent perspectives. Bridging this gap requires effort from both groups.

Beyond Deficits: A Different Way to See Social Cognition

Instead of framing social cognition differences as “deficits,” a more useful perspective is recognizing alternative ways of engaging with the social world.

• Autistic individuals often excel at deep, meaningful conversations when given time and space to process interactions.

• People with ADHD often bring energy, humor, and spontaneity to social interactions, though for those with predominantly inattentive traits, social engagement may be more reserved or introspective.

Rather than trying to make everyone fit into a single model of social cognition, we should focus on increasing understanding, acceptance, and adaptability—both in neurodivergent and neurotypical individuals alike.

Key Takeaways

• Social cognition is the ability to interpret and respond to social interactions, involving skills like Theory of Mind, emotion recognition, and social perception.

• Autism and ADHD both impact social cognition, but for different reasons—autism due to implicit social processing differences and ADHD due to executive function challenges.

• While social cognition can improve over time, the best approach is to foster mutual understanding rather than expecting neurodivergent individuals to conform to neurotypical standards.

By shifting the conversation from “fixing” social cognition to embracing different ways of thinking, we create more inclusive and authentic social interactions for everyone.

Sven Bölte, Social cognition in autism and ADHD